Do you often say to yourself, “I should make my bed, go to the gym, clean out the garage” or something else? If so, you’re not alone. Most of us say “should” more than we realize, and that’s not good news.
Research shows that we have well over 35,000 self-thoughts per day. The truth is we’re constantly talking to ourselves – whether out loud or in our own head. However, even more important than the quantity of our self-talk, is the quality of it.
So what if you started paying attention to your self-talk? You’d likely find that you use the word “should” quite a bit – which, again, is really common! However, “should” is shaming; it often stems from a critical voice from your past and/or you’ve become that critic. “
Either way, what would it feel like to be more intentional with your self-talk? Try saying to yourself, out loud, “I choose to make my bed,” “I’m going to go to the gym” or “I get to go to the grocery store” – remembering that’s a luxury that many people don’t have.
Do you think those sound like insignificant differences? They might, but they actually has an incredible impact. When you stop “shoulding” on yourself, you’ll find you have a more positive, motivating approach to the task at hand. You’ll also have more energy to follow through with healthy and rewarding actions. And with enough practice, you’ll begin to feel the impact of treating yourself with kindness, compassion and grace, rather than condemnation. (And condemnation doesn’t come from God.)
So remember, never should on yourself – or anyone else. 🙂